When Pride Became Personal: My Story as a Mom and an Ally
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Have you ever thought you were the teacher... until life flipped the script?
Because that’s exactly what happened to me. I thought I understood Pride. I thought I knew what allyship looked like. I thought I was the one doing the guiding. And then my kid came out at nine years old, and everything changed. What started as a parenting moment turned into a heart-wide-open, worldview-expanding journey that completely redefined how I show up, not just as a mom, but as a human. Pride, for me, became more than a celebration. It became personal.
Letting Pride In: Why Identity Exploration Deserves a Front Row Seat
So often we treat identity like this big, final destination, like once you name it, that’s it, you’re locked in. But real identity work? It’s messy. It’s full of phases and questions and glorious in-betweens. When my son first came out as non-binary, I was supportive... and also confused. I didn’t know how to use they/them pronouns. I didn’t know what non-binary really meant. But what I did know was that love doesn’t wait until you’re ready. It shows up in the moment and learns with you. And that’s what I did. I learned. He led. And I realized that Pride isn’t just about being out and loud, it’s about making space for the becoming.
Why Letting People Explore Who They Are Actually Works
Here’s the secret: exploration is the healing. When we allow space for phases, we allow people to safely try things on, see what fits, and figure out what’s real. That goes for kids, partners, and let’s be honest... us too. So many of us were raised with the idea that change means instability. But actually, change is how we grow into the most authentic version of ourselves. Giving my son the freedom to evolve helped him feel seen, safe, and supported, and it helped me untangle a whole lot of old beliefs I didn’t even know I was carrying.
What It Feels Like to Get It “Wrong” and Still Keep Going
Spoiler alert: I messed up. I stumbled through pronouns. I said the wrong name. I cried in secret because it was hard to let go of the daughter I thought I had. But every time I got it wrong and tried again, my son saw that love was still there. That’s what practicing this concept feels like, a mix of nervous and proud and wildly human. It’s not about getting it perfect, it’s about staying in it. And when you do? You find that love can stretch bigger than you ever imagined.
The Beautiful Payoff of Letting Pride Get Personal
Watching someone you love become more themselves is one of the most breathtaking things you’ll ever experience. There’s nothing quite like seeing your kid stand tall in who they are and knowing you helped create the kind of home where that was possible. That’s the benefit of letting Pride become personal. It deepens your empathy, softens your judgments, and invites you to expand your definition of love. Not to mention... it rewires your brain in the best way. I mean, if I can go from “what the heck is non-binary” to full-blown protest sign-making Pride mom, you can too 💪
Ready to Let Pride Get Personal for You Too?
You don’t need to have a trans kid to explore this. Maybe it’s a friend, a partner, or maybe... it’s you. Maybe Pride is just your reminder that identity isn’t a one-time thing, it’s a lifelong conversation. So if you’re still figuring it out — who you are, what you believe, how you want to show up — you’re not late, you’re right on time. Let this be your permission slip to be curious, be loving, and let it be messy. Because honestly, that’s where the magic is.
